Ass and Elbows

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. 

Oh, who am I kidding, I never met a holiday I didn’t like.

 But Halloween is in the tops because it is the one time of year me and the hubs are allowed to act as childlike as we want and totally get away with it.  We do this up big.  I know, I know I said this before.  But see, this time I got proof!

So anyway, I was thinking about how big we are going this year and it got me pondering past Halloweens and reminiscing on some funny things that have happened over the years. 

When the Captain and I purchased our first home we were very excited to partake of this tradition of passing out candy.  For me this rates right up there with giving my nieces and nephews the loudest and noisiest toys I can find for Christmas.  That’s right, they don’t live with me. 

When we were overseas we lived off base and Halloween wasn't celebrated.  Coming back to the states meant we would be able to spook out the house and give out the candy.  It is important to note that the Breakey’s don’t give out crappy candy.  It’s chocolate all the way, baby.  I know the “experts” (Martha Stewart, Clinton Kelley) tell you to buy what you don’t like and give that away instead, but really, where is the fun in that and what's the point?

So we're a favorite stop.  Over the years the amount of kids has decreased, but I still purchase the same amount because you just never know.  Besides, it’s not like it won’t get eaten.  Hello, do you know me?  I love chocolate.  So does the Captain.

One year at our last house the kid stream was pretty intense and we were living on a cul-de-sac.  A house down the street was being rented by some Navy guys.  (We are located pretty near a Naval Air Station.)  They were harmless but fun and the second year they rented they decided to give out candy.  (The egg was hard to get off their muscle cars that first year.)  There was one little caveat.  One of them was going to dress up like Freddy Krueger.  He looked really good too.  Had the sweater, the hat and the hands.  Instead of a mask they did make-up and it was spot on!  We thought he looked pretty realistic.  He found many ways to jump out and scare the kids and we kept seeing them running by screeching and laughing, but not overly scared. 

Toward the end of the evening we had these older kids about twelve and thirteen come by.  They had dressed out so they got candy.  We gave them a warning that they needed to be careful down on the dark part of the street.  One of them that was dressed all in blue (for the life of me I can’t remember what he was) assured us, as only a cocky thirteen old can, that there was  no way he would be scared.   I don’t think it was ten minutes later we heard what amounted to girlish shrieks.  (I recognize these as I am a card carrying girl and can shriek with the best of them.)  Suddenly this blaze of blue went whizzing by, pillow case (don't all kids use pillow cases to carry their candy?) goes flying in the air, candy spilling out in all directions and all you could see was ass and elbows.  Nothing could entice that kid back down our street to retrieve his candy.

Yeah, I think the Navy guys won that round.

To this day, that is still one of my favorite Halloween memories.  Tell me one of yours.